counseling

This past wednesday, I had my last therapy session.

I was torn to pieces when I went in for counseling a month after school started. It was nice to be able to unload on someone who only listened. I've kinda decided that when I'm starting to go in that direction again, I'm going to sit someone down that I trust and tell them I need a therapist and don't say anything, just listen--it's okay to make sure you're understanding me, just no solutions. I'll come up with those on my own.

I think about Mom and want to rage and cry--to get a punching bag in a soundproof room and scream my head off while kicking and punching the tar out of that bag.

I don't want to go home tomorrow morning. I would love to see all my family and friends, but the price is so very high... I will try not to miss my flight (though the thought has crossed my mind several times tonight) and take a train to California instead

I might have learned to examine my feelings, but I am still in need of purging. A catharsis of sorts, possibly. There will probably be many before I can truly let go and forget