Progress

Boyfriend said something that offended me today. I was proud of myself for being able to say I still like you, but I'm pretty upset about what you said.

(vs. conditional love)

in other news. I don't know how long it'll last. It was tempting to make it partially about this, but it's really that we can't hang out or go on dates b/c we have no time at all with this job. Also, he loves Utah so so much. I need the ocean. I can't handle life without it

Silly faces

Mary, you need to see this:

This makes me so happy

Reading old talks

This article led me to this one--I grabbed the quotes that stuck out the most to me.


Anonymous - Finding Peace through Forgiveness

"...[What can I learn from the Amish community forgiving the milkman who shot and killed several of their schoolgirls and the drunk driver who caused the deaths of his wife and children?]

"As I considered this question, I became agitated. These stories did not mirror mine. In both cases, the offender had either died or faced immediate prosecution, so the victims did not have to fear ongoing or future offenses. In my case, the perpetrator was still part of my life and wasn’t facing death or a public justice system ... How could I forgive someone who had not yet repented or suffered any punishment? How could I forgive when the offense might even recur?"

Richard G Scott - To Heal the Shattering Consequences of Abuse

"During your journey of recovery, accept His invitation to let Him share your burden until you have sufficient time and strength to be healed."

"While an important part of healing, if the thought of forgiveness causes you yet more pain, set that step aside until you have more experience with the Savior’s healing power in your own life."

"Do not fear—for fear is a tool Satan will use to keep you suffering."

"Remember that predators are skillful at cultivating a public appearance of piety to mask their despicable acts. Pray to be guided in your efforts to receive help."

Updated States I've Lived in, Traveled to/through

visited 28 states (56%)
Create your own visited map of The United States


(so yeah, I might have been all around the southern area of this country... no love for northern states, though, apparently)

It felt nice to know I wasn't alone. I HATE that they have dealt with the pain and the confusion, and I appreciate knowing I am not the only one. -Jen Stockett (Only a little Sugar-Coated)

Small towns have the strangest things

Apparently, these arrows indicate historical locations

Crosbyton, TX

Tahoka, TX

I just don't understand

Also Tahoka, TX

Every time I saw this, I started cracking up

Side of thrift store - Brownfield, TX

The most confusing of all. That is a taco joint behind it...

Floydada, TX

Looks like I could be winning, this round

Life conspired to make things better. I stumbled across a blog of a friend I've lost touch with (who is struggling with healing of her own) and reading it was so healing, just knowing someone else is fighting a battle. She also does lots of research and has really cool facts and quotes posted as well.

I was able to just sit around and relax and then got a basic job without any headache extra stuff (package equpiment) and made friends with the couple that I installed yesterday to the point that they invited me to do fireworks with them today. I was really touched. Also, they've got four dogs--2 are large and 2 are medium large. I was so happy and I played with them after the install. They were all super sweet XD

I just got a new camera because my old one crapped out on Monday. I'm excited to try it out tonight and finally exercise my photographer skills again. I've missed it tons. Since there's not a Wal-Mart in the town I'm stationed in, Steve is picking up a micro SD card for me (my new camera didn't come with any memory at all). I'm excited to be in a family atmosphere again.

Talking about depression last night with Steve and discussed how not only is it addicting but it also saps your will and/or desire to fight it in the first place. He had drug-induced depression during HS and it's nice to have someone that understands, but is currently the most happy person I've been around in ages.


PS - Happy 4th of July!!!

=\

So life has slapped me around a bit this morning. A tiny bit last night, too, but mostly just today. I really don't take criticism well. I wish I was better able to handle it, but when I get told that I am wrong, my first reaction isn't "How can I fix it?" it's more along the lines of "Dang. I suck and I messed up again."
(usually after I get a chance to think about it, I try to think of how I could've improved, but I'm not good at on-the-spot stuff)

Depression monster strikes again. I think it's a more or less even match right now but I guess we'll see who is on top at the end of the three rounds...